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Originally Posted by Colm OReilly  Problem #1.
I think this is a result of you only seeing two potential states: Completely alone or getting on fantastically well with everyone, regardless of circumstances. An important realisation I had a while back was that there are levels to everything, and nothing is strictly dichotomous. So right now you're a white belt at conversation, and you want to be a black belt, that's all you can see. But you've got to start small and start developing basic skills. |
How am I supposed to improve? Right now I really am alone. I don't have anyone on my MSN list now, don't have anyone on my phone, no friends, and I regularly fight with my parents. I really am just getting up and living without a single friend.
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Potential Solutions to #2:
Tragically, people make their confidence and self esteem dependent on external factors. Which means all that confidence is is an emotional payoff, not a driving factor in their life. When everything is going great, they feel fantastic, but you don't really need confidence then, do you? When things go bad, their confidence goes (since it was attached to the external circumstances) and now when they most need it they feel the least confident. It sucks, but it's generally the way we're taught about confidence.
In essense, most people are effects, not causes.
You're looking to feel worthy and get validated by people. Ironically, to be recognised as worthy and be validated by people you need to do this yourself.
Simple affirmations to use:
"I feel validated."
"I feel valuable."
Overall I get the impression you never stick at anything for very long. You try something a few times and if it doesn't work, you dismiss it completely. What you need to do is stick with things for longer than a week or whatever. If you can't completely stick with something, see if you can break it down into an easier part and work on that.
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I don't feel validated.
I don't feel valued.
And I have no idea how to keep doing something for more than a week.
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Also, let's look at your interactions and how you view them. A brief interaction is better than no interaction isn't it? Be thankful for that. Some success, no matter how small, is better than no success, isn't it?
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Right now I have no success, and no qualifications. And no life.