TeroMiettunen, the fact that you still remember them might mean that you have some work to do.
The
good news is: the unconscious mind is responsible for repressing memories that you cannot deal with, and only uncovering those memories when you
are able to deal with them
you can trust the wisdom of your unconscious mind; after all it knows better than you do when you get a cut and it heals it for you.
A technique from NLP that helps is time-line therapy, I'm going to give you a quick abridged version so you can do it and see how differently you feel afterwards.
1) Find a place where you won't be disturbed.
2) Close your eyes and relax.
3) Remember a time when you were disturbed or bullied by these bullies.
4) See what you saw, hear what you heard, feel what you felt, as if you were really there, looking out from your own eyes.
5) Run through the whole movie til the end, then step out of yourself and ask yourself this question:
what internal resources would you need in order to handle the situation better? Confidence? Assertiveness? Humour?
6) Feel these internal resources within you now. You can do that a few ways; by remembering the last time you felt this way, or imagine yourself as a movie character or someone you know who does, or imagine these resources flowing into you as colors from above, whatever works best for you.
7) Go back to the beginning of the event, step into yourself with these new resources, and replay the event again, seeing how differently you handle the situation with these powerful internal resources within you. Go all the way to the end.
8) Go back and find at least 3 new behaviours with these internal resources inside you, behaviours that serve you and are good for you in the long run.
9) Go to the end again, step out of your body, float waaaay up and all the way into the future, looking back at the event and now in the past as the older you, with more experience and wisdom. Ask yourself this question:
what lesson do you need to learn from this past experience so that you can let it go peacefully and without regret? And listen for the answer.
This is a shortened version of the process I used to get a near 60 year old man to let go of a guilt he felt ever since he was a teenager for a major event in his family. I hope you find it of value too
