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imhnyc · 12-05-2006, 02:04 PM

I have felt discouraged about my appearance, lack of friends and seemingly no hope of improvement. Thankfully, at some point, I recognized that I while I wasn't at that very moment what I wanted to be - I had all the potential to be what I wanted. It seems cliche but seeing those less fortunate than me is what made me snap out of my negative thought pattern.

My realization came in two parts:

1) I had legs to walk, a mind to think and a good heart to feel. With those things, I could exercise to become physically attractive, I could educate myself so that I could hold a conversation with people and also pursue things that made me happy/excited and I knew what was good vs bad so that I could do the right thing for others.

2)My pride made part 2 difficult to swallow though. Part 2 was that I was basically impatient, lazy and wanted instant gratification. Those traits were holding me back. I had a perfectionist attitude that if I wasn't perfect already why bother at all. Well, I had to be my own coach and force myself to work for progress rather than perfection. But it is an everyday struggle not to allow myself to give up. Many times I give in to self-pity and I have to work through my reasons for doing what I'm doing so that I can get back into a positive mental state. Not easy. But seeing a little success helps to keep me from falling too far.

These realizations only came to me when I was through college. While I don't want to lay on you the typical "you're young and have you're life in front of you" line, I think that fact that you are young should give you hope. If you were to take the next 5 years to transform yourself, you'd be able to enjoy the fruits of your labor at the very exciting age of 21! If you take the time now, value yourself, care for yourself and give of yourself to others, I'm sure you'll be pleased with all you accomplish in time.

I hope you don't feel put off by my comments. I am myself imperfect and have a hard time following my own advice, but I just felt I needed to give you some support, albeit from a stranger.

Best of luck to you.

12-05-2006, 02:04 PM	#13 (permalink)
imhnyc Junior Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 7	You have what it takes to be the person you want to be I have felt discouraged about my appearance, lack of friends and seemingly no hope of improvement. Thankfully, at some point, I recognized that I while I wasn't at that very moment what I wanted to be - I had all the potential to be what I wanted. It seems cliche but seeing those less fortunate than me is what made me snap out of my negative thought pattern. My realization came in two parts: 1) I had legs to walk, a mind to think and a good heart to feel. With those things, I could exercise to become physically attractive, I could educate myself so that I could hold a conversation with people and also pursue things that made me happy/excited and I knew what was good vs bad so that I could do the right thing for others. 2)My pride made part 2 difficult to swallow though. Part 2 was that I was basically impatient, lazy and wanted instant gratification. Those traits were holding me back. I had a perfectionist attitude that if I wasn't perfect already why bother at all. Well, I had to be my own coach and force myself to work for progress rather than perfection. But it is an everyday struggle not to allow myself to give up. Many times I give in to self-pity and I have to work through my reasons for doing what I'm doing so that I can get back into a positive mental state. Not easy. But seeing a little success helps to keep me from falling too far. These realizations only came to me when I was through college. While I don't want to lay on you the typical "you're young and have you're life in front of you" line, I think that fact that you are young should give you hope. If you were to take the next 5 years to transform yourself, you'd be able to enjoy the fruits of your labor at the very exciting age of 21! If you take the time now, value yourself, care for yourself and give of yourself to others, I'm sure you'll be pleased with all you accomplish in time. I hope you don't feel put off by my comments. I am myself imperfect and have a hard time following my own advice, but I just felt I needed to give you some support, albeit from a stranger. Best of luck to you.