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dancer · 05-23-2008, 10:12 AM

Hi Lauxa,

Have you read Erin's Getting Back to Love article. It is not directly related to your current situation, but you might be able to put a spin on it to fit the spitting and temper tantrums, or it might inspire you to come up with other creative solutions that might reach your daughter. Obviously, you could not apply something like this smack in the middle of the tantrum, but shortly after.

There are parents on these boards and I hope some of them spot your post and share some of their methods. Why not post something directed to parenting skills. Or chat to parents you meet in real life.

There may not be an overnight solution, but I'm sure there are more positive solutions than resorting to the hitting game. Initially, it might get results, but do you want to plant fear and resentment in your child? When my mother hit me, I silently told her 'hit me or you like, but you cannot hurt me', I also resented her and sometimes did things out of spite just to push her buttons.

Something tells me if you deal with the attitude of "having to get through raising your kids before getting back to your life", your situation will be easier. The thing is Lauxa, your kids are part of your life. Either, decide to make it a great experience where both you and your children enjoy it or make other arrangements. Not everyone is suited to being a stay-at-home Mum and there is nothing wrong with that.

Meanwhile, I hope we here at the board can give you support and lots of virtual hugs.

Love
D.

05-23-2008, 10:12 AM	#14 (permalink)
dancer Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 522	Hi Lauxa, Have you read Erin's Getting Back to Love article. It is not directly related to your current situation, but you might be able to put a spin on it to fit the spitting and temper tantrums, or it might inspire you to come up with other creative solutions that might reach your daughter. Obviously, you could not apply something like this smack in the middle of the tantrum, but shortly after. There are parents on these boards and I hope some of them spot your post and share some of their methods. Why not post something directed to parenting skills. Or chat to parents you meet in real life. There may not be an overnight solution, but I'm sure there are more positive solutions than resorting to the hitting game. Initially, it might get results, but do you want to plant fear and resentment in your child? When my mother hit me, I silently told her 'hit me or you like, but you cannot hurt me', I also resented her and sometimes did things out of spite just to push her buttons. Something tells me if you deal with the attitude of "having to get through raising your kids before getting back to your life", your situation will be easier. The thing is Lauxa, your kids are part of your life. Either, decide to make it a great experience where both you and your children enjoy it or make other arrangements. Not everyone is suited to being a stay-at-home Mum and there is nothing wrong with that. Meanwhile, I hope we here at the board can give you support and lots of virtual hugs. Love D.