[silvercherry]

Not very original I know...

I've been in this sales job for over a year now, been in sales for 5 years since the start of my career. Last year was good with some great deals but this year I am really struggling. I work hard, make calls, have meetings and all the rest of it but all my deals fall through and it feels like i have nothing to show for it at the end.

I'm really struggling to accept this or to fight this even. All my life I have flown through all the challenges, school, college, work. I work hard and have high expectations for myself but I have always succeeded in everything. And now I feel like a total failure and I dont know how to turn this around.

I try to think positive and tell myself a single call or deal could make a difference so i keep going. But i am getting nowhere and i know that somewhere deep down i feel like im gonna lease this deal, right from the start, because thats what happened with the others.

Now Im in late 20s and have an "amazing job" with an "amazing salary" to most standards. I work from home and am pretty much in control of my schedule. The problem is i moved to a foreign country with my OH where i dont speak the language. And i think omg, what would i do if i quit? i cant even hold a decent conversation, let alone find a job.

Im stuck, I have just had a chat with my bosses and I am on a "performance plan", to help me they say but i know its "do or die" from now. I have no idea what to do. Right now i just want to curl up in my bed.