[viscapes]

Hi teacher,

I'm a little younger than you (although not as wise I'm sure) but I too live in a city away from the rest of my family so I know how guilty it can feel to be missing out on things. I'm also considering moving to another country which will make this a little harder.

Do you have anything to feel guilty about? Do you consider yourself to be close to your parents? Do they know that you love and appreciate them and feel loved in return? If so, that's pretty good. Many people who never leave their family home don't even achieve this.

If you consider yourself to have nothing to feel guilty about then don't. What does it normally take for you to feel guilty? Is it something that is outside of your own control? Does relieving the feeling guilt rely on others telling you that you have nothing to feel guilty about? That's not within your control, and will only make it easier for you to feel guilty. Instead, redefine your rule for feeling guilty. "I feel guilty when I don't live by my convictions, when I ignore my emotions and when I don't express my feelings to the poeple I love most in the world." That would be entirely appropriate and totally within your control. Live by this and you won't feel guilty.

I hope this helps a little.

Cheers
Paul