 How to be a man? What's with #2
I really enjoyed this article but kept re-reading #2, "Put your relationships second.", over and over again. I just had a hard time making sense of it.
Steve writes, "A man who values individuals over his own integrity is a wretch..." seems to imply that I am either not "whole" or "complete" if I place my family first in my life, or that I am being immoral by doing so? The second definition doesn't seem to fit, but the first one also begs another question. What is to say that a man has to sacrifice part of his "wholeness" by putting his family first in his life. This assumes that men need to be somewhat selfish in life in order to be complete.
Personally this is hard for me to swallow. I accepted a lifelong commitment to my wife and to be a father. Within those commitments come a level of responsibility to each other and our children. If I don't put my wife, or children first most of the time, who will? Sure, I sacrifice freedom on some level but I made that choice, I accepted that responsibility in exchange for the joy of a loving relationship and fatherhood. To me, a man is exhibiting integrity when he lives congruent with the commitments he has made.  |