Originally Posted by Spartan
Realtionships based on mutual respect and acceptance are usually thriving ones, unlike relationships which are fettered by some socially constructed 'polarity'. Talking about polarities in this way is restricting, since there are too many nuances in behaviour.
By the way; I think a long time ago the socially accepted relationship role of man was very dominant in the relationship and often controlled the woman.
That is NOT what you are shooting for.
I think; however; nowadays; a lot of men are living there lifes for the approval of women. Women hate that. They want you to be strong and confident in yourself and what you want out of life.
Two great books about this are The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida and On Being a Man by Sam Keen.
I am not 100% clear yet all the time what my role as a man is. Then I learn; but I am definitely aware that there is a polarization difference. This doesn't mean she is less than you; you are both absolutely equal; you just have different functions, different roles.
If you want to find a masculine women and play the feminine part; fine; it will work out fine probably.
If you look in gay couples, by the way, there is also always a more feminine one and a more masculine one.