It sounds like you do not possess a standard of behavior that you will and will not accept both from yourself and others. Actually, you do, but since you didn't reinforce it (because you were unaware of it), both in yourself and with him, you feel bad and made a post on a forum asking for help. The answer is to have a standard. And you don't do this by "putting your foot down" and telling him out. Just be more positive than him and beat him at his own game.
I get the feeling you feel stifled, while he can get away with anything. This is absolutely false - in your life, within your conscious experience of living, the buck stops at YOU. I feel like if I told you to tool him back by being louder than him, you would say "I would not do that, I'm too nice," or "I cannot do that, it's not me," or some other rationaliztion. But really, that's the best way you can both deal with it, and grow from the experience (as opposed to leaving the department/company or complaining to your boss or something). Of course this does not apply to every situation, but this is a social situation, and in these, just establish dominance. Anticipate that he has to listen, because you are a person that others listen to. If you anticipate a good response, people tend to give it. And if they don't you're a positive person, so it doesn't bother you.
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