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Originally Posted by Ikk  What could be her reasons for leaving me if she actually still loves me (which I have good reasons to believe she does)?. |
Hi, Ikk. Welcome to the forums. I'm sorry it's pain that brought you here, but I hope we can do something for you, and vice-versa.
You know, just because two people love each other or feel like they are soulmates doesn't mean they belong together in a loving, long-term mutually beneficial relationship (LLTMBR). You can love each other, and still let each other go with love. That would be your best bet. Like when you drop your hat in a river of boiling lava, you'd better let it go because man, it's gone.
It sounds like you're both in your very early 20s, right? She needs to explore and discover a life she loves before she's ready and experienced enough to want to make a commitment to a man (which I assume you are, sorry if I'm presumptuous). If I had married the man I lived with when I was 20, there is no way we would still be married when I was 30, and he is a great guy. It doesn't mean anything about you.
The most loving and generous thing you can do is to honor her request, and let her go; deal with your feelings with your friends and family, not with her. She does not owe you "closure" or an "honorable ending." That is up to YOU on your own.
It's possible that you two will meet up again later, but a true reconciliation is not possible until you have let go of your attachment. At that point, you would be able to see each other fresh, as the newly created people, free of your old pain, that you will both be.
It's hard, I know. But you will make it much easier for yourself, for her, and for your future LLTMBR if you practice acceptance.
I highly recommend reading Byron Katie's "I Need Your Love - Is That True?" -- that book has been really helpful for a lot of other people in these forums who have been through what you're going through.
Best wishes to you. You
will feel better.
Lots of love,
Angela
p.s. Your English is excellent, what are you talking about?!
