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Originally Posted by Rockchick26  But how can you be interested in someone before you start talking to them? Sure you can be interested in their looks,but how do you ask questions and genuinely be interested when you are only talking to them because you think they are attractive? I don't like the whole concept of feeling forced to talk to someone. Maybe thats why i dont have many friends or guys asking me out because i dont like to talk to them if we don't have to. Like,at school or work or when youre hanging out with friends,thats when conversation comes easy because you're there for other reasons not just to get to know this person. So then its easier. But if you're in a bar,on a blind date with someone,God that is the WORST!! |
Well you said something there. You have no problems at school, because you understand the common ground between you and the other people there. Maybe you should try and see the common ground you have with the people at clubs and dates ? You're probably there for one of two reasons: to listen to good music and or dance, and to socialize/meet people. That's why you are there. So you can start out with that as a common base, realizing that they are in the same boat as you, just like at school.
Also, don't think so much. In school, you don't have these type of thoughts buzzing around your head "what are they going to think of me ... blah blah. So don't think those thoughts at the club. Just be there.
But I have to ask, why ARE you at the clubs. You said you don't like to talk to people if you don't have to, so why do you put yourself in those social type situations ?