Originally Posted by Gabriel.B
Ree, You've made an interesting point, I suppose to a degree I do focus on the down side, but what is more I'm beginning to think that it might be a negative belief I hold about myself, maybe that I'm bound to have downs that last a long time or maybe on some form of deeper level that I won't make it or maybe even don't deserve to?
My life has been filled with failures, and I say failures because I feel I didn't learn much out of them (or reap the potential reward) or even better said, I rarely completed something, I've always had a big mouth as to what I want to do, but I've rarely ever gone through with it and thus I've built a reputation of being enthusiastic and excited about things but rarely following through, not walking the talk.
And I REALLY want to change that.
I had major problems at school over all the years I attended and didn't complete my education, in a sense I feel that there might be a deep belief within me that I can't accomplish things, that I can't finish things, that I'm a failure, that no matter how hard I try or what I do I'll always fall flat in front of my goal. I think that school sub-consciously pounded that into me. That is why my PD is so important to me, it proved me otherwise, it showed me I could do it, I'm just struggling now because it's an issue that has remained unresolved for a long period of my, actually so far, short life. I've heard about the Lefkoe techniques which I'm very interested in, but of course cannot afford, so I'd appreciate if anybody might know other techniques to unroot beliefs and 'reinstall' new ones, just not in a superficial manner.
What you wrote above is what can be called "your story." Byron Katie asks us what would we be without "our stories?" (We all have a story
The things you wrote, that you're a failure, that you can't finish things, et cetera, are statements you've probably been making about yourself for as long as you can remember. These statements probably run through your mind constantly without your even being conscious of them. But are they true? Or have you just trained yourself to believe them?
And you're right about these beliefs about ourselves being pounded into us. It happens many many different ways -- school, church, parents, siblings, peers. Obviously, you are questioning and seeking and that's what you should be doing now. It's an exciting time when you first discover that maybe your "story" isn't what you've always thought it was. No doubt you are on your way to finding that out for yourself!