I hear you. I think that what you really mean to say is that nothing that you are told you are supposed to live for seems worth it. It all seems empty and meaningless, and you just wish that everyone would stop asking you to want it.
My advice? I'm not sure, I'm wrestling with the same issue. What do I do if I'm not doing what I'm told? What do I enjoy if I don't want to enjoy what I'm supposed to? Now you could off yourself, but then you would never find the answer. And I know that you want an answer. So you'll keep looking, and I'll keep looking, and in the end I'm sure the answer will be so obvious that we won't understand how we never saw it in the first place.
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We must conquer ourselves, and allow our selves to conquer the world. |