Quote:
Originally Posted by kthdsn  I think there is a scale of compatibility, you might be highly compatible with some people and not very compatible with others. The key is to find someone you are compatible enough with to care deeply about each other and want to share your lives with each other. |
I completely agree with this! I think you can make any relationship successful if you're willing to work hard at it. I am incredibly blessed to be married to my soulmate but it still takes quite a bit of work to keep the marriage running smoothly. We have been married for 9 years now (I am 28, my husband 31) and we've had our ups and downs but through it all these things have kept our love for each other very strong:
- Mutual respect
- Complete honesty
- Good communication
- Being proud of each other's achievements
- Total trust
- Never taking each other for granted
- Making time to spend together (very important, especially if you're both working 40+ hr weeks)
I also strongly believe in never criticizing your partner as this can be
so damaging. Ironically I see it all the time in my own parents and parents-in-law where the wife criticizes the husband for not doing something or for eating the wrong food / not exercising etc, and it never actually gets results and at the same time creates resentment which is extremely damaging to any relationship.
My husband and I work so much better by simply using encouragement and thank yous, for example - if my husband has forgotten to put his socks in the washing basket for the 1006th time I don't nag him about it I just politely ask him to take care of it, which he usually does almost immediately, and then I thank him! It did take me a while to learn to do this - it feels weird to have to thank someone for something you think they should do in the first place - but it's
so very beneficial and I can contribute a large amount of our success together as a couple to this one thing alone.