Why struggle, man?
Believe me when I say I understand the pain of loneliness, but building walls around yourself is NOT the answer. Shielding yourself from pain is NOT the answer.
The way you see it, crashing & burning is not a good thing. It certainly doesn't feel like a good thing. But it is. It's all about growing and loving. And don't run with a loose concept of "love", filled with flowers and chocolate hearts. I will allow my naivete in this matters say that love is not something you own, but something that you experience and learn from.
Wanting to be with someone is a beautiful thing, man. Don't try to kill that desire (because, in fact, you can't). As I said in another thread, this pain you are experiencing is a good thing. Use it to make a decision. Use it to take control of your relationships. The road is paved with tears, pain and shadows... But that's the beauty of it.
Can't remember where this is from, but...
Quote:
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I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it.
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Good luck!