Quote:
Originally Posted by JimOfferman  Likewise 
I don't like making people angry either, but I know it can't always be avoided - just as I can't always put a lid on my own anger.
Bad tempers may appear to be the norm, but they are not in fact normal. A bad temper is just an excuse that someone uses to avoid taking responsibility for his (or her) feelings. It's taking an emotional dump on your partner or friend and then leaving them to sort out the crap. But sorting out the crap is your own responsibility, not theirs.
It is also your own responsibility to stand up against being dumped on. If you don't do that, you are basically telling everyone that it is just fine to crap on you - so that is exactly what they will do.
Standing up for yourself makes things better, not worse. |
hello, JimOfferman!
i guess i have always looked at it like .. if it makes him feel better then i should inwardly handle it or deal with it or whatever. i wish that he would do as you say and take control of himself in that manner, but at the same time i would not want him to fail to express his true feelings to me. but you know -- i know there are better ways of doing that. gentler ways. sometimes it seems like there is no brain -- just a huge flame burning between his ears, and during that span of time, he has to hurt everything that he comes in contact with. i wish that i could help it not to be like that.