Originally Posted by Faye
JimOfferman!!! thank you so much for the welcome. it is nice to talk to you.
ack! it is just that i am rather skittish. i don't like to make anyone angry, especially him. it is really difficult for me to ever be angry and when he is mad he says the most awful things. i think that is normal though, right? some people just have a bad temper. sometimes i wish i were the fiery sort of person who can stand up to things like that, but when i think about it, it probably would just make it even worse.
I don't like making people angry either, but I know it can't always be avoided - just as I can't always put a lid on my own anger.
Bad tempers may appear to be the norm, but they are not in fact normal. A bad temper is just an excuse that someone uses to avoid taking responsibility for his (or her) feelings. It's taking an emotional dump on your partner or friend and then leaving them to sort out the crap. But sorting out the crap is your own responsibility, not theirs.
It is also your own responsibility to stand up against being dumped on. If you don't do that, you are basically telling everyone that it is just fine to crap on you - so that is exactly what they will do.
Standing up for yourself makes things better, not worse.