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Originally Posted by PrimaryErn  As for the x-worker angle, I fail to see what's the difference if two x-workers engage in actions that benefit the collective in some fashion, but x-worker #1 does it for selfish reason "I want to benefit myself" and x-worker #2 does it for "I want to benefit others". Just because someone didn't ask #1 for it nor #1 did it to intend to serve people, the fact remains that the benefits have happened; sometimes the exact same benefits as x-worker #2. In fact, that's what (bear with me now) I think Steve was talking about when he said that both paths ultimately lead to the same place. Maybe?
Anyway, I can't beat this horse any more so I'll let you others get the last word in. Hopefuly a new blog post will clear up my muddled thinking. I still can't reconcile the post and the previous ones about "love of evil" and so forth. Well, I can, if I assume that the darkworker in the new post got an evil-redesign and isn't the one from the older posts. |
Your thinking is clear. The idea of doing something as service to other or for yourself is not just one or the other. Everyone is trying to fit into what Steve says, which, imho, is not how it is. A lightworker of a fully awakened being will be in line with the will of the divine and find motivation that feels like something the individual wants to to, really wants, and it just so happens to benefit others greatly. It's a matter of bring your spirit into your individuality and having the light shine through you. It's not about trying to figure out if you are motivated to better yourself or to better others - because that distinction does not exists for someone that's awakened. There is no sense of self that is exclusive. It used to be before modern society gave us money and cell phones and email, that the sense of self included the whole village. If someone in the village was sick they didn't think, oh that's ok because I'm not sick - they just didn't think that way. They were ligthworkers because their sense of self was not exclusive.
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I hope Steve takes my questions in the proper light - I love the blog and think it's very useful and recommend it to folks - hell I even donated once. I just don't understand this last bit, yet, Sensei. I suppose it's because I loved the concept of darkworker 1.0 and was actually polarizing towards that to address some self-issues, and now I find that darkworker 2.0 says I'm an evil hitlerean vampire. Ouch.
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There's other ways to look at it that make more sense to me. darkworkers are part of lightworkers. It's not a balancing act swinging from one to the other. a darkworker is the seed for lightworkers. This is the same conclusions I had the other time. It you don't take care of yourself you can't give. a darkworker just is learning to give at the level of what they think the self is. Once the concept of self becomes more aware the giving happen to the old small self and others naturally. No need to figure out if the service is to self or others because at that level it's all Self.