You already know the "right" choice for you. But - you're afraid to take it.
Why? You claim it's out of love for him, and I believe you. I believe you truly love this guy - you're not trying to change him. But the real question is: do you love yourself? Because you're trying to change yourself.
Ultimate question: if you don't love yourself, then is what you give to him really love? Or is it just fear, clinging, and neediness?