Quote:
Originally Posted by Angela  Well, how do you feel about granting her (and you) the freedom to be exactly who you are and exactly who you are not? Including giving yourself permission to really dive into your anger, to feel it rather than resisting it, to trust it to give you the right message?
How do you feel about deliberately thinking thoughts that have you feeling just a little bit better.... and get you on an upward spiral. I don't know what that will be for you, but how about : "I found in this relationship that I have tremendous capacity for love and commitment. Although Brunhilda wasn't in the same place, that doesn't diminish my love and my power. We're both doing the best we can, and I'm building the power now to generate a really loving long-term mutually beneficial relationship (LLTMBR) with the right woman, when the time comes. I'm preparing myself to be the best possible partner for a woman who is preparing herself right now to be the best possible partner for me. I'm looking forward to meeting her and sharing a life filled with growth, love and freedom, and I trust that we'll meet at exactly the right time of readiness for us both."
...... or something.  |
Wow! Thanks everyone for the great responses so far.
Angela, you just made a huge light bulb flash in my head. There's allot of truth coming from what you said.
I have become so focused on getting over this relationship that all my spiritual and personal growth has been geared towards that. What was was wrong with me? Why do I have such strong fears of abandonment? What did my parents do in my youth to make me this way? I quit going to therapy for that very reason. It felt like we were digging up things that yes may have some relevance to my feelings, but it seemed counterproductive to just focus on what was wrong with me.
It's time to shift that focus to working on myself again to prepare for the right partner and life that I want. That's where I was before I met her and making steady progress...maybe even a bit arrogant in my growth. Sometimes it seems the universe just has to slap you down a bit to remind you how human we really are.
Wellbeing, you've also touched on something huge. Having this anger and making contact has kept a part of this dysfunctional relationship alive...kinda twisted.
Why the heck have I waited so long to post here?
