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Originally Posted by Gene  I do feel connected to my partner. It is just not a connection in the way I understand "soul mate."
Is my dilemma a labeling problem, an expectation problem, or is it really a problem created in order to experience problems? I have so many questions!
What I know is:
I spend time with my partner and we both work at nourishing our relationship and building on the love that we have for each other.
I am committed to the relationship and I believe she is also committed to the relationship.
We talk to each other about important stuff and are intimate emotionally and intellectually as well as physically.
This is the most functional romantic relationship I have had in my life. By functional I mean that I know where the boundaries are and do not mistake myself for her or her for myself emotionally or otherwise.
I have had some spectacularly dysfunctional relationships and this is new territory for me.
So rather than put a lot of expectations on my Life with Mai (my partner) I believe I will accept the "what is" of this moment. This moment is nice.
Thanks for listening to a pilgrim on the journey!
Gene |
Hey Gene, it looks like you are enjoying a fulfulling and loving relationship with Mai. That's great isn't it? Congrats!
I guess your question popped up because you may want to connect on a different level with Mai, something that's beyond words or actions. Am I right to say this?
How connected are you two spiritually? Do you share the same faith?
I'm asking this not because I'm suggesting soul mates have to be connected spiritually, but it does help to a certain degree if you have that. I just thought maybe this question can help light up some internal cells to give you some clue?
And yes, I agree with many others that there could be soul mates with no romantic interest, as there will be a loving and lasting relationship with a life partner but not necessarily be able to transcend into becoming a soul mate.
But really, do not give yourself added stress on this issue. Ultimately, what is the outcome and expectation you have from this relationship and from Mai? If you have achieved them, then continue doing those things that you did right and just enjoy the connection you have.
It's really very precious to find such a person whom you love and who loves you back dearly in life.