[C33]

I am 41, looking younger, and I prefer younger men.

Experience has taught me that chasing them ends up
making me look like a " cougar " and I hate this term.

I also don't want to make men think that I am just after something fun and temporary. I can deal with that sort of situation but I want a relationship and will be patient.

Lately a very young man has been buying me coffee and being very nice to me. I am a very bad judge of men's interest, especially when they are much younger.

I have tried to read nothing in it, but I have to admit his attitude is intriguing. He has bought me and brought me coffee twice at work, I have a menial job and cannot help him in his career in any way. One time he brought me coffee with pastry, which was very sweet, his gallantry made me blush which I admitted, because it was too obvious to hide:

The danger is that I am so starved of any care and kindness from men that I might have misconstrued the whole thing. I offered to buy him coffee twice and he refused very sternly. We are on friendly terms and I will leave this job very soon.

I am wondering if he treats me nicely because I am a mother figure to him or if he is romantically interested. If it was not for the age difference I would say he is interested. But I am a very poor judge of men's behaviour and do not want to appear foolish if I look like some icky Mrs Robinson.

I am not the hot 40 years old type, à la Madonna, even though I intend to seriously improve my appearance in the next months, and I guess I don't see why he would be attracted to me, while entertaining the thought ( and hope ) that he might be.

How do younger men show attraction to older women? Any women have successfully dated younger guys?