looks aren't just about how big your boobs are and how much skin you're showing off...
-smile! be cheerful and happy and you get bonus points (more bonus points if you can genuinely be a happy upbeat person)
-eye contact! if you like a guy, be sure and do the burning eye contact thing when you're talking to him (hint: if you forget to do it, try working out what colour someones eyes are when you're talking to them)
-flirt! kind of optional and needs to be used wisely, but a bit of innuendo and playful naughtiness can get your intentions across.
-understand men! a bit of a tricky one to learn, guys work different to girls, so if you can work out what a guy means when he says something you'll save yourself a lot of heartache. Admittedly you need to balance and make sure the guy understands you as well, but be sure and do your side of it too.
On the changing yourself thing? I think its not so much "stay as you are" vs "pretend to be someone you're not so people will like you", more changing into what you should/want to be.
Eg: practicing talking to strangers will train you to be more friendly. You'll have changed as a person, but you'll still be you. Joining the party clique because they're "cool" if you're not really a partyer would be going against who you are, but learning how to have fun and enjoy parties would still be you being you, just with more skills.
I'm sure theres a more sophisticated version about ego and all that, but I still don't quite get it enough to explain it like that.
become sassy, independant and feminine because *you* want to, do the whole personal devlopment path and learn how to "be yourself" (if only because having to deal with insecure girls gets reaaaaaaally boring for guys)
oh! oh! one more thing! most important thing in dating ever!!!!!!!!
do what works for you!
to hell with what people tell you to do, look at what you've done before and pay attention to what works and what doesn't. Find the patterns of what led to good stuff and what led to bad stuff. work out what kind of guy you like and what kind pisses you off! try all the different stuff that people tell you to, but only so you can work out if it works, not because its what you're "supposed" to do  |