I can kind of understand this. I made some serious commitment to change and I have changed massively - I got rid of the anorexia I'd had (I used to weigh 64lbs) for about 15 years by simply making the decision to eat, for example. Then over the last five years I've gone through phases of change and always fallen back.
One day, I had a conversation with a friend and he was the first person who said "I don't think you believe you can change. You hope you can, but you don't believe it."
I gave it some serious thought, and realised that I not only didn't believe I could change, but part of me didn't want to. It's fantastic reading books about changing your life and being different, rich, successful, happy. Then you realise that your pain is a security blanket, it will affect your life, your relationships and everything you do in ways you never imagined. I often see posts from people saying "I've changed massively and I'm losing my friends/partner/family as a result." I read other posts from people wanting to do amazing things with their life, but without, essentially, changing where they live, what they do and any of their friends.
It actually takes real courage to commit to that kind of radical change. We talk about the blocks with negative beliefs and limiting thoughts, but they're only tough to get rid of if you're committed to holding on to them. The truth is, it's difficult to change that much because making that change completely rips the rug out from under you.
I've read a few times that most people prefer to want to be multi-millionaires than be one. It's actually a lot of responsibility or you'll just lose it all. People would rather yell and scream at their partners and family rather than really doing the work on themselves to find out where they're not working in the relationship. They'd rather settle than go for somebody they can be really vulnerable with. It's actually really scary going for that change. We get keen to blame self-help speakers, the books we've read, the people around us, our friends, our partners, our family, our children, our therapist, when actually, the responsibility lies solely with us.