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MissACT · 04-04-2008, 05:46 AM

OK - I know this is going to sound like I am being Bridezilla but I am having a few issues with my parents and my upcoming wedding and I need some advice!!

My fiance and I live in Australia and we are heading to the states to get married...we have my parents and my future in-laws coming over for the wedding and some friends as well.

When we booked the wedding date, I made it around when my mother and father were already there (they had a trip already planned) and actually brougt the wedding forward to suit them better, which meant that some of our friends were unable to attend....loyalty to parents I suppose.

As we arrive at our destination in the middle of the night our first night - we were going to stay that first night with my parents to save paying for a room for half a night....this was all agreed months ago and so we have gone and booked all our accommodation for the wedding and honeymoon etc....today my mother calls and pretty much makes me feel we are "inconveniencing them" by staying the night as we may not want to sleep (after a 24 hour flight we may have already had tons of sleep) and they will want to and we will disrupt them (these were not her exact words but what I interpreted them as).....I was fuming to say the least and am not speaking with them at present.

To top it all off they have a car while they are there and would not even come to pick us up form the airport as they are going to a show that night and want to be able to drink....is that pathetic or what....how hard is it to drive 15 mintues to pick us up..

I feel like they are being very selfish considering the lengths I have gone to already like making the date when it is so that they would be there and having our friends miss out...one of my very close friends has to be at home on that date for reasons best left unsaid and was crushed when I told her the date had changed to a week earlier!

Also, my grandmother (in her late 80s) is being flown there to attend...and as she is on a pension and unable to afford to stay in a hotel on her own, she is staying with my parents....and all my mother can do is complain that she has to put up with her for 4 days and it will ruin her holiday....I feel as though by us having out wedding there it is making things really hard for them and "putting them out". My Aunt used her flyer miles to fly my Nan to the wedding and my parents wanted me to give her spending money (that she spent for the taxes on the flight).....$200USD for gods sake we are paying for nearly the whole wedding ourselves....I'm not impressed.

Has anyone else experienced these same issues?? I am embarassed about it all and hate having my fiance's parents hear about it as they feel sorry for me...they don't make me feel embarassed but I still feel that way.

His parents fall over backwards to help us and yet mine are the opposite...I get the feeling that they feel as though now we are all grown up we don't need nurturing and can fend for ourselves....

04-04-2008, 05:46 AM	#1 (permalink)
MissACT Junior Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 1	Dealing with Difficult parents... OK - I know this is going to sound like I am being Bridezilla but I am having a few issues with my parents and my upcoming wedding and I need some advice!! My fiance and I live in Australia and we are heading to the states to get married...we have my parents and my future in-laws coming over for the wedding and some friends as well. When we booked the wedding date, I made it around when my mother and father were already there (they had a trip already planned) and actually brougt the wedding forward to suit them better, which meant that some of our friends were unable to attend....loyalty to parents I suppose. As we arrive at our destination in the middle of the night our first night - we were going to stay that first night with my parents to save paying for a room for half a night....this was all agreed months ago and so we have gone and booked all our accommodation for the wedding and honeymoon etc....today my mother calls and pretty much makes me feel we are "inconveniencing them" by staying the night as we may not want to sleep (after a 24 hour flight we may have already had tons of sleep) and they will want to and we will disrupt them (these were not her exact words but what I interpreted them as).....I was fuming to say the least and am not speaking with them at present. To top it all off they have a car while they are there and would not even come to pick us up form the airport as they are going to a show that night and want to be able to drink....is that pathetic or what....how hard is it to drive 15 mintues to pick us up.. I feel like they are being very selfish considering the lengths I have gone to already like making the date when it is so that they would be there and having our friends miss out...one of my very close friends has to be at home on that date for reasons best left unsaid and was crushed when I told her the date had changed to a week earlier! Also, my grandmother (in her late 80s) is being flown there to attend...and as she is on a pension and unable to afford to stay in a hotel on her own, she is staying with my parents....and all my mother can do is complain that she has to put up with her for 4 days and it will ruin her holiday....I feel as though by us having out wedding there it is making things really hard for them and "putting them out". My Aunt used her flyer miles to fly my Nan to the wedding and my parents wanted me to give her spending money (that she spent for the taxes on the flight).....$200USD for gods sake we are paying for nearly the whole wedding ourselves....I'm not impressed. Has anyone else experienced these same issues?? I am embarassed about it all and hate having my fiance's parents hear about it as they feel sorry for me...they don't make me feel embarassed but I still feel that way. His parents fall over backwards to help us and yet mine are the opposite...I get the feeling that they feel as though now we are all grown up we don't need nurturing and can fend for ourselves....