 One step forward- two steps back..
Last week I was feeling finally over my ex. In my heart I wished him well and felt free, happy and open.
Then out of the blue he called. Not wanting to get back or anything romantic, but he said he had always enjoyed talking with me and just felt like chatting, so we had a friendly talk about daily life, his dreams (I would always interperet them), family, work etc.(not "us")
It was nice but I didnt feel so great after, it just opened up old feelings again. so I texted him that it was nice to chat but I need some distance for now. he wrote: OK take care of yourself
Since then every night I hold myself not to call him. Suddenly I miss him so much, and want to hold him. I find myself typing out text messages which I never send...
But NO- I dont want to go back to him. intuatively I feel there is someone else for me. And we obviously didnt get on, (and I dont think he wants to get back either.)
But since I told him I need my distance I cant stop thinking about him. At night Im wondering around sleepless. I havent acted on my desire to call him cause I'm afraid to ...
I started seeing someone new for a while, nice and attractive, but when he told me he was falling in love with me after the 4th date(!), I decided to stop seeing him. I just ended another phone conversation with a freind who told me that he wanted more then friendship. I politely but frankly said NO to him too. I guess Im not ready yet.
I guess calling the ex would be a bad move, I know this, but its turning to something much bigger in my mind, and stopping me from moving on...
any suggestions?
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