Personal Development for Smart People Forums - View Single Post - rant/vent: why is my ex-bf treating me like I'm still his gf?

uberinquisitive · 03-15-2008, 07:59 PM

It was my birthday yesterday. He told me he would call me. But no call, no text, no email.

And...I don't feel upset! Instead, I feel compassion for him, and gratitude. This is HUGE.

I feel compassion for him: "he's at a 2-day bachelor party in Montreal. He's having fun. I'm not his gf, per say. He doesn't want to lead me on. He needs his own emotional distance. He doesn't mean to be hurtful."

I feel gratitude for me: "so many people called and emailed and Facebook-ed me about my birthday. I'm so lucky!"

I'm giving myself permission to gently and kindly leave him. I don't like how I've taught him to treat me. I don't like who I am around him. Obviously, I need to do a lot of personal work. Nothing is set in stone - maybe when I feel more grounded, he can come back in my life.

03-15-2008, 07:59 PM	#31 (permalink)
uberinquisitive Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 634	It was my birthday yesterday. He told me he would call me. But no call, no text, no email. And...I don't feel upset! Instead, I feel compassion for him, and gratitude. This is HUGE. I feel compassion for him: "he's at a 2-day bachelor party in Montreal. He's having fun. I'm not his gf, per say. He doesn't want to lead me on. He needs his own emotional distance. He doesn't mean to be hurtful." I feel gratitude for me: "so many people called and emailed and Facebook-ed me about my birthday. I'm so lucky!" I'm giving myself permission to gently and kindly leave him. I don't like how I've taught him to treat me. I don't like who I am around him. Obviously, I need to do a lot of personal work. Nothing is set in stone - maybe when I feel more grounded, he can come back in my life.