 Dealing with Death
I lost my mother almost 2 years ago to cancer. I was 15. I did not cry much when she died, I was trying to be strong for my elder sister who's more, emotional, so to speak.
I shunned my friends and saw the world in a different light, or shall I say the light of indifference. A lot of people said that I was empathetic and was really good at tapping into people's feelings but after my mother died, a black hole inside grew bigger and bigger everyday.
I've had dreams of my mother since then and not all of them were pretty. I woke up crying sometimes. I still feel lost. I don't like to talk about my mother with my family or anyone else. I hate when teachers in school are concerned. I call it prying.
Am I being unfair to the people around me by being negative? On one hand, I want to let go and move on but on the other, I feel that would only mean forgetting my mother and I don't want to do that because the memory of her is the only thing I possess.
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