On the other hand, it could just be plain old ego drag. Sometimes ego just obstructs us from whatever brings us joy, probably because joy is the natural state of the spirit, and ego resists spirit. Who doesn't want to practice? There is a part of you that does and a part of you that doesn't, and this fragmentation leaves you at a standstill, unable to take total action one way or the other. Meaning, if you practice part of you will still want not to practice; if you don't practice part of you will feel guilt for not practicing. Neither is complete action. So ask yourself, who wants and who doesn't want? Then ask who doesn't want, what it does want. The answer will probably be "nothing." It might come out as "watch TV" or something like that, but it will probably be some form of nothing. You can be sure this is your ego. Say hello. Ask if it dislikes practice. Ask if it could enjoy practice. Ask if it would enjoy refining skill. Keep asking it questions--each question will release a little bit of the drag until you're light enough to practice. Then practice in full presence of the present moment, with no thought for past or future.
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