This is such absolutely perfect advice.
Can you see what I meant when I said to you in the IM forum that you have a tendency to sound frantic? "I want to feel like" "I just can't help but want" "I want to know" "I want to know that something that I want" "I don't want to live hoping" "I inevitably waste years of my life on this"
It sounds like you are putting way too much stock into what you think are signs about a certain guy, if you then waste years of your life waiting for something to happen, rather than continuing to go on about your life.
Also, you tend to have very rigid and narrow definitions of what an acceptable relationship would be. Here it's the structure of how it starts. You want to feel like something is meant to happen, that it's destiny, and you'll know the instant you see him, across a crowded room, there will be this magical moment and you'll know he's THE ONE.
What if it's not like that at all?
I agree with you that these things tend to be more mirrors than signs. I told a story in another thread about having a big crush on a rock star, and the coincidences involving all this were sometimes hilarious and sometimes disconcerting, but I never thought it was because he was my soulmate or anything . . . it's just that I was thinking about him all the flippin' time and I was walking around all in love/lust Big Crush and all that, it seems inevitable I was attracting his music and his name and people who like his music and so on.
Since coincidences/synchronicities are my thing, I've learned that they don't tend to be signs, unless maybe I'm asking for a "yes" or a "no" or a "not yet" on a decision. As danas said, they tend to be reflections. Maybe a wink from the universe. I've finally started keeping a journal of all this stuff and also putting in there cool coincidences I remember from years back. This morning while going through auction stuff, I ran across an old map of Michigan's U.P. with tourist spots of interest. In my mind I went back to a weekend my mom (who passed away many years ago) and I had traveled up there, and went to a supper club where one side dish was "vegetable." I jokingly told Mom I'd get "vegetable" as long as it wasn't rutabagas. She said a little sarcastically that she seriously doubted it would be rutabagas. Sure enough, it turned out to be rutabagas, which we thought was rather bizarre.
I typed that up in my journal this morning. Then late this afternoon, still going through auction stuff, I was looking through the contents of old Wisconsin Trails magazines and run across an article called "The Reluctant Rutabaga." Which made me smile. I added that to the journal, and found that the rutabaga story was the last thing I had typed in there.
I really don't think this is a sign I'm supposed to run out and buy some rutabagas, which I don't even like. It's just a reflection. And a nice one, also. Hi Mom.
It also showed me I should learn how to spell "rutabagas" correctly.
