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Originally Posted by Angela  My point for Rockchick is that coming to L.A. to couple up with a hot male rockstar (who, by the way, is neither overweight nor bald, who is not confident, who feels like women will never like him, who doesn't care about money, is under the age of 25, and the rest of her endless list of qualifications), she will encounter a magnified version of what she's experiencing now -- a rather serious dearth of potential suitors. |
. . . down to earth, doesn't run around, doesn't have a big ego, and is just looking for someone to teach him how to love again . . .
This too is where I start thinking, the qualities specified by Rockchick for Ideal Man are so opposite from "rock star" or even "successful band member" that it's astounding. It's like saying, "I want Mexican food. But I don't want it to be spicy. And I don't want it to have any cheese. Or any tomatoes. And I want it to have a name that's not in Spanish. And there can't be any rice. And the restaurant should be playing rap music. And everyone who works there should be Asian."
Rockchick. You've done a lot of posting and gotten a lot of responses from many people. What I see is this. You say something. Somebody responds as to how they perceive you. You protest and say that isn't you at all, and give a long explanation of what you actually are like. This has been repeated over and over and over. You come across as frantic. (Now you'll respond and say "Really, I'm not frantic!") The way you are coming across on this forum is probably the way you come across in real life. You need to take a deep breath and CALM DOWN. (Now you'll say, "Honestly, I was already calm!")
LoA is supposed to be about going with the flow, being in the zone. If you've stopped clinging to the bank and you're floating freely along the river of life now, and you tried to grab a lily that was floating by and you missed it, you don't get freaked out. You say, "Well heck. Probably an even better lily's up here somewhere. Or maybe not even a lily. Maybe some flower I don't even expect. Cool. Let's see what's up ahead."
My suggestion would be to start with your first post and take a look at how people answered you, and continue up through your most recent posting. When somebody answers you, instead of shifting into protest mode, stop for a second and think, "Ok. I see what you mean." And then for real, see what they mean. Most of what everyone here is telling you runs along the same lines. I don't think the whole group can be totally wrong.
P.S. It probably doesn't have to be L.A. You know there's a terrific music scene in the Twin Cities.