Rockchick, although I don't see the Law of Attraction as the be-all end-all answer to all of life's questions, you seem to be really trying to reconciling what's going on in your life versus what you desire, and I want to just let you know that you believe you want a loving, long-term mutually beneficial relationship (LLTMBR), and yet almost all of your posts belie the belief that you can have one.
In LoA terms (at least the Hicks version) what's going on is your core belief, which you hold so deeply that you can't even see that it's a belief, is that you can't find the right man. And that inhibits the fruition of your conscious desire to have a LLTMBR.
In non-LoA terms, (the Angela version), it looks like maybe you've got some deep-seated and possibly unexamined belief about yourself, maybe about what you deserve or don't deserve, maybe about who you are at your core that means you can't have the LLTMBR that you dream of.
LoA or not, I think your core self is knocking you on the head, trying to get you to examine your beliefs about yourself more deeply than you have ever even conceived possible, so that you can unlock the key to being in a rewarding romantic relationship with a man.
Is that something you are willing to do?
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