Hello all (sorry in advance for the length of this),
My first post here. I've been lurking forever and meaning to comment but until now never really had much to say, other than thank you--to the Pavlina's, to everybody here for all the great info.
It just seems to me that Erin's blog today is another great example of a powerful concept and tool I'm learning to use in my own life. The more I grapple with my own growth the more I realize how big
forgiveness is.
I came to this site a little over a year ago in search of healing. It's funny, I read how Erin was opened up to feel all the pain in the world, and I can't help but think she probably got a healthy dose of mine. It was about the same time I learned things that, well . . . let's just say, not so good things.
It shattered me and I'd be lieing if I said I'm fine now. I have to forgive every day. Often I fall short.
But even at the time I realized the truth of the past would destroy my ego--my sense of self, almost all of the ideas about who I was.
In fact most of the life I've built has been based on choices I probably never would have made had I known the truth. Indeed there are people that now live on this earth that probably would not be here had I known the truth.
I can honestly no longer say "this is
my life." My ego had to die. The problem is--it hasn't.
So I still struggle. But I know if I work at it, my higher self will shine through. My greatest pain can also be my greatest joy. My ego's death allows for a rebirth--a miracle born of mistakes.
Forgiveness.
It's a big deal. It keeps you present. It's a doorway to Now. There is no room for ego in forgiveness. Here it's fine (good even) to be broken. Here there is power in surrender. Strength in weakness.
It's weird, but the more I study and reflect, the more it seems to me that the answer to so many questions, the healing of so many wounds is waiting to be born from tiny eggs of forgiveness.
Crack the shell and experience a shining new world.
Later,
1dra