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Originally Posted by Rockchick26  So basically youre saying to cut him out of my life? That doesnt seem like the right answer because then he'll only be more upset,how am i fixing things by running away from him? |
Was it SonoranBob the other day who said something like, "why should they change what they're doing, since they've found someone like you who has such low standards that they're willing to accept such terrible behavior?" (he said it much better.)
What I mean is: in this case, you have been condoning your dad's abuse by making yourself present to it again and again. Have you ever said something along the lines of, "Look, Dad, I'm not willing to subject myself to your constant criticism, yelling, complaining, fault-finding; I'm committed to living a life I'm in love with and that junk has no part of living a life I love. You're free to keep criticising, yelling, complaining, and finding fault with me, but I won't be around to hear it if you do. So: make your choice, Dad -- do you want to keep a loving daughter, or do you want to keep your junk? I'm happy either way -- it's up to you."
Being a victim means allowing another person to dump his junk all over you and making it your own. You're allowed to say No, Thanks! if you want to life a life you're in love with. That's not running away at all! And it's not cutting him off, either. It's making a stand for how you want to life your life, regardless of the actions of others.
It's up to you, Rockchick! You get to choose.