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Originally Posted by The Cloud  That's because you're looking outside yourself for a reason to live, trying to replace self-esteem with girls. I bet that, like I did, you see girls as a reason for living. You find a girl you like, and you use her as a reason to better yourself, to advance yourself, to make yourself more. I know that when I was obsessed with a girl, I got the best college semester GPA that I have ever gotten. |
Not really. I fall, even more, in a state of inactivity.
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But it wasn't worth the misery of not being with her and trying to become better just because of her. She became my reason for living, and when she refused me I had nothing but to cling to her obsessively. Maybe you aren't doing this, but I suspect that you are.
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Not anymore.
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If you do, the only cure is to try and find an internal reason that you are good, that you are worthy of yourself. You aren't going to be able to find something positive that motivates you outside of yourself; whether it's girls or success or money or even activities that you like to do. None of it is going to be worth anything unless you first believe that you are worthy of being happy without those things.
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I'm not sure I believe in the whole external / internal reasons. Would you be happy being the only person on a island and hence almost no external influences? If I look at myself there sure isn't anything that motivates me.
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Your problem is not what you are doing, it is how you are thinking about it. There is a basic question, "why," that you have not answered about your life. This is the question you must ask, and ultimately answer, if you ever want to be happy.
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I've asked 'why' a lot of times. About pretty much everything. Its now more of a matter of 'when' my time is over.
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I might come across as rude but I really appreciate your input The_Cloud
