Quote:
Originally Posted by cdn2wheeler  Getting a mate or being a mate still requires another person (or more than one, if that's your thing) to be in the picture. And that, regardless of one's intentions, will require some action to go out and meet someone. They may approach you, but you still have to take 100% responsibility (sound familiar?  )and get out of the house....
All that said - and I may be starting to hijack my own thread here - it's clear that the best present you can give to your partner and to your relationship is a healthy, happy, well-adjusted self. And I think that's what you may be referring to, Angela, in discussing "being." |
Yeah, to yourself, too, don't forget.
I disagree with you that being a mate requires the presence of another person. If you are being a mate, it makes no difference to your
way of being whether your mate is there or not. *getting* a mate indicates to me a sense of dissatisfaction, because once you succeed, then you must *keep* her, and that's a whole paradigm that doesn't work for me. So yes, success in *getting* does depend on external circumstance -- the physical presence of another person. And you know I'm not big on depending on external circumstance for living a life I love!
So what I'm saying is, *getting* is eternal work, and *being* is eternal fun. Both are viable approaches, and the necessity for action depends on which approach you choose.