So whose stubbornness can you do anything about?
-- the stubborn boyfriend, who chooses to be in the relationship with your friend, and it looks like it's working out pretty well for him;
-- the stubborn girlfriend, who chooses to be in a relationship with him, who loves him, and who is also getting something out of it that you're not seeing;
or
-- the stubborn you, who is over there in those two people's business?
If I were you, I'd take action in the one stop where I could make a difference. I realize you love your friend and don't want to see her in pain, but her pain is a result of her own free choices, and she's learning what she needs to learn -- you can't learn it for her. I'm not saying you shouldn't voice your opinion. But once you've done that, her life is up to her, and my guess is that you belaboring your objections will only cause her more pain and resistance. She doesn't need fixing.
Now: what is possible for YOU out of your complaint about being stubborn? Where can you see that you being stubborn is an opportunity for your own growth?  |