[draag]

When you are involved in a dispute with someone else, it may be the only time
doing nothing is better than doing something. There's a practical reason for
this. When you quarrel with others even if you win the argument you place a
great deal of unnecessary stress upon yourself. It is impossible to maintain a
Positive Mental Attitude when you allow negative emotions such as anger or hate
to dominate your thoughts. No one can upset you or make you angry unless you
allow them to do so. Instead of arguing with others, try asking non threatening
questions such as: "Why do you feel this way? What have I done to make you
angry? What can I do to help?" You may find that the entire situation has
resulted from a simple misunderstanding that can be quickly rectified. Even if
problems are more serious, your positive behaviour will go a long way toward
helping resolve them.

"Successful People Are Average People Focused"