some good limericks
A young whore who came from Lahore
Would lie on a rug on the floor.
In a manner uncanny
She'd wiggle her fanny
And drain your balls dry to the core.
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they say that Dublin has an annual dirty limerick competition, and the winner gets to recite their limerick. well one year it was won by a little old lady who was dreadful embarrassed about it, and she asked the organizers if she could "bleep out" all the extremely naughty words. they consulted and said yes, we suppose that's your prerogative. so she stood up on the rickety podium, looked out at the hundreds of amateur and professional limerick writers and said:
bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep
bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep BLEEP
bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep -
the bleep bleep bleep bleep
bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep f*cksticks.
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this one is pretty bad
There was a young surfer named Dave,
Who found a dead whore in a wave.
She had but one tit
and smelled like fish ****
But think of the money he saved.
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That twisted ol' dude called Leee,
Had a thing for a woman's knee.
He tossed her a coin
She kicked in his groin
And now he is known as Cicely.
******************
A woman looking for Nabitsuh
Did carry two boxes of tissue
One was for her brow
Winking, she said how
“The rest are for in case he missed you”
*******************
That recently single dude Martin
told his ex-wife "Since our partin'
I've had women and men
Several geese and a hen
and a Hoover, and that's just for startin'."
**********************
there once was a man named mark s
quite strongly opposed to excess
his pontifications?
abbreviations!
now [x] is to [y] = guess
**********************
an aesthete of burly dimension
easton sat in his pew in suspension
for disciples seemed neater
their story much sweeter
when he imagined the sexual tension
**********************
Monica Lewinsky has shown
What Kazynski must surely have known
That an intern is better
Than a bomb in a letter
When deciding how best to be blown
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another kinda crude one (yes i know, i excel at crude
)
A ♥♥♥om lass of Aberystwyth
Took stones to the mill to grind grist with
The miller's son Jack
Laid her flat on her back
And united the parts that they pissed with
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Adrienne