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Originally Posted by JimOfferman  NotesMaeve, you have the most interesting family! :P
And I completely agree!  |
Heh. Well, I'm taking a break from the clan for awhile. They're a little too interesting these days! As I told my mother, "Y'all fight, work it out, and call me when the dust settles."
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Originally Posted by Angela I think the thing that might get in the way of a successful LLTMBR is that one partner starts off on significantly less powerful footing, and I think the best partnerships are more free-choice, more-or-less equal power.
The mail-order person would be constrained by the legal, immigration, language, cultural, and separation-from-family-and-security issues. And the mail-orderer, it seems to me, would be vulnerable to exploitation. Wouldn't it be better to go into an LLTMBR feeling free and powerful? |
Agreed, in principle. Lovely Aunt S was a super-aware woman who wanted out of Thailand. Why? Not much of a future there for her and my cousin H.
When she met my uncle, sure, she was looking to get hitched. J's a nice dude. For her, it was a way out. For him, he got a smoking wife who is a lovely person. She's educated, funny, sweet, a helluva cook.
"Mail order bride" is kind of a misnomer. Most of the ones I've known are really smart and know they can bail after a year's marriage. Staying in a country like Thailand or Russia can be way worse than enduring your average crappy American marriage for a little while.
"Mail order brides" work for a dude that's respectful and just wants a marriage to someone who wants a traditional but good life. I welcome these women to take these guys, because I sure as hell am not interested in a traditional wifey role!