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Originally Posted by The Flannel Guy  -Yeah, not much of a people person. Though it may sound contrary to some of the thing I said early, I dont like large groups. They freak me out.
I can give a speech, but a large group of people for instance a wedding, freak me out. I dont know why. I just do not like those situations. I have kind of given up on talking to people at times.
-Also most people seem afraid of meeting new people. Like if they talk to someone new they will be embarrassed or “called out”. I really dont understand this! Women seem to do this more than men though. Women seem scared to talk to a guy most of the time. Are women taught to be especially timid creatures or what? |
Dude, read the two things you just wrote. Basically: "I get nervous in social situations." and then: "Why the **** are all the women nervous in social situations?" You're projecting "they will be embarrassed or 'called out'", meaning, it's really you that is afraid of being embarrassed or 'called out'. That is probably why you are fine giving a speech - you just get to run your mouth without worrying what people will say in response, since in that setting they don't respond.
In this case, apply the famous maxim: "Be the change you wish to see in the world." Especially in this specific case - I can speak from experience when I say that as a man, if you act calm and cool and relaxed, the women you are with will respond to that energy and be calm and relaxed as well.
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Originally Posted by The Flannel Guy However, I dont say what I think about various things because it seems to foster animosity towards me. |
Here, you foster animosity towards others who offend you by being materialistic and superficial. So when you do open your mouth about the things you think, you probably emit a subtle level of this animosity, which, as above, people respond to in kind with the same energy except in retaliation. This is the cycle of violence.
So the prescription here is to contemplate your feelings towards these "other people" who you think you're so different from, and to realize (now, later, or never... because it is the truth) that what you really feel animosity towards is that part of yourself that is materialistic and shallow. You've wanted a new toy. Don't pretend you haven't. Did you berate yourself on the inside when you realized you might be becoming *gasp* one of "them"!?
All anger is self-anger. If you accept yourself fully, you can walk into a party full of college students getting trashed on alcohol and pot, and have a deep conversation. The trick is to accept them fully for who they are, and to celebrate their differences from you.