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Originally Posted by Enlightenment  i'm starting to become aware of just how guilty, and frankly, embarrassed i feel with standing up for myself. excuse the lack of caps here but i'm having trouble with my keyboard. anyway, i hinted to someone the other day that i wanted something confirmed and verified. you know, 'trust but verify' sort of philosophy. but now i feel guilty and a bit pushy. if i were a man, this would be accepted easily, but i think many people, including women, consider a woman setting down on the table, even vaguely, what she wants as 'bitc-y'. i don't want to be rude or contrary, but sometimes i feel that in order to get things progressing, i must state my demands, politely. how would you deal with this guilt and embarrassment. |
I understand where you are coming from and I am not sure of the context in which you are standing up for yourself, but it is important that you do stand up for yourself if you feel you need to do so. You can do it in such a way where you are still calm but firm in your reaction to your situation. I also understand how others, women surprisingly as well as men, see women stating what they want as "bitc-y", because of their preconcieved notions of how women "should" act. It's pretty rediculous. Can you give a little more detail about what's happening?