David, as a former (and occasionally reoccurring) computer game junkie, my advice is to take a break from computer games. Personally I've found that when I'm heavily into computer games, they are just about all that I think about--I want to play them, make them, etc. Granted, we might have different personality types, but I find that when I'm not using computer games as a crutch, I think all sorts of different types of thoughts, and in general become a more balanced and aware person.
I spent 10 years of my life working a 'safe' job and playing computer games. I know when I first started doing the PD thing, I felt really bad about my past, too, and felt that I had wasted 10 years of my life. Thinking about the past was very painful and full of regret. I'll tell you now it is possible to let go of those feelings, because I've done so.
I don't know how heavily you play computer games, but I'd suggest taking a break from them for a week. During that week, instead of playing games spend time reading, thinking and journaling. Personally I found just writing about my fears and regrets to be a big help. The more you know about your fears (and I had some pretty silly ones, like feeling anxious about going outside and walking down the street) the less power they have over you.
Dealing with regret is similar. You have to face it. Instead of trying to push painful thoughts out of your brain as quickly as possible, you have to face them and ACCEPT them--accept that they are part of you. I personally found that repeating "I love you and I forgive you" to myself while facing such regret and pain helped me make peace with myself. I found that once I made peace with myself and my past, I spent much more time in the present.
I hope my post is some help to you,
Ollie
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