M,
i hope this does not sound like it is coming from anything resembling a high horse, because it is truely not. But, if you think for a moment how can "mind over matter" be rubbish? Every action you make is a result of directions from your mind and, while your emotions may have a large part in controlling these directions and, thus your actions, you are the one ultimately in charge for every action you make. I am not quite sure i buy into the whole "you are in control of everything in this world" mindset that people on this forum (intention manifestation) seem to be preaching like gospel, but i fully believe in the fact that you are in control of your physical body. However, if you believe that you are not in control, and that your emotions have more power over you than your mind, then you are essentially sacrificing all will over to your emotions and are setting yourself up for failure. I know it's a frusterating dilemma when you dont beleive that you are in control, because the only way to succeed is to believe. Perhaps you should consider meditation, or even just simple visualizing, of yourself engaging in healthy lifestyle behaviours and losing weight. image what it would feel like to achieve your goal, and visualize yourself doing so. Visualize yourself approaching the fridge for something to eat and then turning away and visualize yourself going for a walk, even when it is the least thing you feel like doing. I know that this sounds far too simple to solve a life changing problem and, in a sense, it is. However, remember that the largest goals ever achieved always start with small simple steps.
The bottom line is, that you are in control of yourself. It is not easy to accept and take over control after a long hiatus of letting your emotions take over the reigns, but it is something that i believe you can do. And, whether you decide to go with the surgery or not, it is still a task that can help you with other areas of your life and well-being.
Wish you the best.
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