Quote:
Originally Posted by PennyD  Maybe I was meaning do I have to be 100% responsible for the ongoing romantic success or passion of the relationship. |
If I were you, I'd examine what that means. If you are going to take on responsibility for something, it would probably be a good idea to understand clearly what it is you're responsible for, don't you think?
So: where does the ongoing romantic success or passion live? Inside you, or outside of you? Is it you, or him, or a third synergistic entity? I like the way Byron Katie describes "business" -- there's your business, there's the other person's business, and there's god's business. (For Katie, "god" means "reality"). You are responsible for your business, that is, your feelings, your choices, your life. He is responsible for his. And God (reality) is responsible for the stuff that neither you nor your guy has control over -- like death, tsunamis, third party synergistic energies.
When you start going over there to the other guy's business or god's business, then who's here taking care of your business? Nobody!