 Thank you,
Penny and Mark,
You brought clarity and compassion to this matter, and you were right on the money!Thank you for your encouragements.
Yesterday night, I allowed myself to let the disappointmentt out of my system by indulging in a few tears...
I decided to do something unusual: celebrate my failures at getting proper lodging and the proper guy by having a glass of bubbly and a few chocolates( did not overindulge: had a glass and a half and ate about 4 chocolates).
I was saving these goodies to celebrate moving in my new place or to entertain this new guy!
Instead, I decided to be thankful for the lessons learned and to reward myself for moving forward with my life and being persistent with my intentions.
Also, I put a cap on the amount of time to be sorry for myself. The goal was to be over the disappointment by this morning and to change tactics by releasing expectations.
I chose to spend the working day ( we are co-workers, soon to be separated to work in different locations ) in a state of appreciation of his person.
He was kind, respectful, friendly and proved to me that my perception of him had been right. ( At least I didn't delude myself, which is something I tend to do when in love).
Not only is he a great guy,but he is close to 90 % of what I want,and yes, Penny, I think I didn't truly believe I could get 100% of my list).( He even likes to dance, which is something really rare in a heterosexual man!)
The romantic part of me would love him to be in my future as a boyfriend, however, I will be happy with being a friend, or at least a pleasant memory.
I understand that he respected me by not pursuing anything further. He acted like he realized I deserved and wanted a committed relationship, something he was not able to offer, as he seems more on an experimental phase of life.( He is younger.)
The apartment is not forthcoming either, but I am confident I will get a better one than the one I lost yesterday.
Thank you again for your valuable input.  |