[templanoid]

Originally Posted by JimOfferman

Yes, I genuinely thought it was funny and the mere fact that I had a laugh out of it, proves that your assertion is, in fact, not true. Don't you just love logic!

So that laughter is not because I was trying to be funny, just the fact itself was true, which thus made you laugh. (Again i'm not trying to argue that i'm not funny here..but I honestly think that is the case, no?)

So you're not a natural comedic. Big deal! Your ability to relate to other people is not dependent on your comedic talents. If that were the case, we'd all be experts in the field by now because all non-funny people would have long since died out as a result of natural selection.

But most people I know know how to say humourous things that is generally funny and causes others (including me) to laugh. What really depresses me is that I cant find anything to say that's funny, not even in my own mind. I can't really seem to come up with something that I *myself* find funny. I'm just very good at logical thinking and analyzing like those things you see in those scientific documentaries..no emotions, no laughter...that's how it's like inside my brain.

Did you know that the great Rowan Atkinson is actually a very serious person in real life? I even dare to bet that he isn't all that funny to be around, outside of office hours.

Humor is a skill that can be learned like any other, not a character trait.

I think that's different because Rowan Atkinson's nature of being funny doesn't come from the way he talks, but the way he acts..which is easy for anyone to learn, imo. But what I'm talking about here is having a humours mind, that can think of anything and turn it into a funny concept. Do you see what I mean?

You have caused and effect reversed: a person that is confident can talk well - not the other way around.

Yes, I get what you mean, I agree....I guess I do lack a lot of confidence in that case? How do I gain that back? I can't just "believe" that I have it out of nowhere.

The gist here is that you see yourself as boring. Let's start with that. If you don't even find yourself interesting, how can you expect this from others? Sounds a bit unreasonable, dunnit?

I got to admit, I don't know if I finf myself interesting. I find myself being interested in other things, but I doubt whether I myself am all that interesting.

And I know that you are wrong. 100% sure. Beyond any reasonable doubt. You are, in fact, very interesting. The challenge that lies ahead, for you, is to convince yourself of that fact. That's your first job. Convince yourself. I wish I could do that for you mate, but I can't.

Are you saying that I am interesting because every human being can be interesting? But do you think that you could be generalizing a bit here? Everyone is not the same is it?

And how will I be able to convince myself when I've never noticed myself in the situation of being interesting to others or being humourous? This has to come from somewhere, and especially I can't make this up..or I feel like I'm spinning something up and lying myself.

Whether or not you have a girlfriend or how many friends you have says absolutely nothing about you. Those things are circumstantial. People might find it easier to relate to you if you have more confidence, but that doesn't magically up your friend count.

I agree here. But the fact that I never had one at this stage *is* not the norm and slightly unusual. Which, in a way, thus signify my social inadequacy.

In principle, yes. Acknowledging the problem is the start of the resolution. But, again, I don't think that not being a good talker is your problem.

So what would you think is my problem? Lack of confidence?