Charlie the type of love you are describing here is a suffocating one. Be brave and overcome your jealousy before it overtakes you and destroys the relationship you are fighting to keep. Your enemy is not James - it is your own insecurity. And this is great because you have control over your own emotions.
BTW you have no control over your girlfriend. She is free to choose whom she texts, talks with and shares her time with. How would you feel if James was a girl? I assume it would no longer be a problem. Does loving you mean she has to cut off all others and things in her life? Is this reasonable? Has she given you signs to mistrust her? It sounds like she is honest. Loving and caring about you does not mean her giving up her friendships, dreams, needs, values, etc. and this is what it seems you expect her to do? Give this some thought...
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