"Meta Personal Development Mindset (TM)"
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thought replacement theory
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modeling
related posts by Steve
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2004/10/modeling/ http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/200...brains-brains/ http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/200...ering-beliefs/ http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/200...ng-techniques/
Most of the Personal Development material has one thing in common: it tries to change a part of your thinking. I recently have begun seeing Personal Development material through this new lense. If I read an article or a book, I see the author is trying to convey to his audience a certain way of thinking about an area of life. A lot of times the author himself had a challenge and he tried a number of different solutions. Almost always this solution consisted of thinking in a certain way about the challenge and then acting on those thoughts. The core part of the solution is the thoughts on the challenge, not the actions themselves. So one solution came up as good or great and the author decided to write about it. If you experience a similar challenge and you read his or her work you can also apply this thinking strategy. You "copy" this strategy, apply it and do or don't find that it works for you.
An example from my own life. I have a debt from my college years. I recently discovered how much it exactly was, and it was more than I had hoped or known. I was in some kind of denial about it but now it's crystal clear. The moment I exactly heard how much it was, I felt myself being shocked and starting a stress reaction. I caught myself doing this and I consciously started thinking positive and constructive thoughts about this challenge. Thoughts like "I am capable of handling this challenge", "I am an intelligent young man who can make money, so this debt is a matter of working a number of years and then it will be gone", "Reacting stressfully to this news won't help me think more clearly in finding a good solution, so I'd better relax and then think about it", "There are a lot of people who have debts that are much greater and they have all overcome them, so I can and will too", etcetera. By thinking these thoughts I calmed myself and within a few hours I took some steps to start paying off the debt. Very pro-active, very constructive and while feeling good. Note that my initial reaction was one of stress and fear, then I used the thought patterns I've learned from Personal Development material and they helped to make my behaviour and emotions a lot more productive.
I have been consuming Personal Development material for about 8 years now. What I started to notice in my thinking over the past few years is that I've incorporated a lot of quotes I've read and ways of thinking I've read about. I became conscious of this when talking to other people about challenges in each other's lives. I heard myself saying things and taking views at certain challenges that I knew were from the Personal Development materials I read. The good thing is: they helped. All of those thought-patterns or quotes were positive and constructive, as they should be.
Another way to view this "meta personal development mindset (TM)" is the following. Imagine for a moment that your mind has left your body and that it's been replaced by some think-tank of great minds, say: Gandhi, Mandela, Mother Theresa, Bill Gates and some guy named Steve
. Those people will tell your body exactly what to do, how to do it, when to do it and then some. Do you think that the life of your body would change? Maybe be more successful in a lot of ways? My guess is that your body would get up early, would eat healthy, be loving to everybody it meets, be economically smart, be peaceful and a gazillion more great things. If you look at it this way (mind you this is a thought-pattern all of itself) you can't blame your surroundings, body, or any part of your current situation for anything that you think is wrong with your life. You can only blame your thoughts. But don't start blaming just yet, your thoughts are what they are, feeling bad or making your parents or friends feel bad won't help you change them. What you could do instead is look for people who are succesfully changing their old thoughts to new and more constructive thoughts.
Another thought pattern that superbly supports this "meta personal development mindset (TM)" is the following. We have 6 billion people on our planet, everyone of them has their own share of life challenges. Almost everybody has to get up to go to work, everybody has loved ones who eventually will die, lots of people have children, people have money challenges and (supposedly) everyone is mortal and must face their own death. The great thing is: everybody is trying to overcome these challenges to the best of their ability and knowledge. So if you have a challenge, realize that probably a lot of other people have overcome a similar challenge. And a few of them probably wrote a blog, article or maybe even a book about it. So plug into the human database of knowledge (internet, libraries, friends, relatives) and try to find the way of thinking about the challenge that enabled those people to succesfully overcome it. Thought patterns on different types of challenges are spread through the world in different ways. A nice site with lots of examples of people's challenges or goals is this one.
The world's most popular goals on 43 Things
Examples.
Many religions have as a thought-pattern (or belief as they call it) that after you die, you go to heaven/are born again/reach Nirvana. These thought pattern handle the fear of death pretty good, I'd say.
If a loved one dies, you sometimes hear people say:"think of the good times you've had with that person" or "be grateful you had that amount of time with that person".
If you have a hard time waking up in the morning, there are quite a few (279.000 hits on Google) sources of information available. Solutions like Steve's say that humans can grow used to getting up early
If you have questions on how to raise your children there are lots of books filled with thought patterns on how to think about children, their development. If you have a successful mindset on children you can react effectively to their behaviour.
If you want to send a spaceship to Venus, you go to the library and find books filled with the way scientists see the physical world around us. If you start sharing their view and then build a spaceship according to the laws they have formulated about the universe and spacetravel you will be able to send your rocket.
The big "but"
There is however a part of Personal Development literature that does not have the goal of altering your thinking, books like "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. This book tries to help you in entering the here and now and shutting down the "incessant" mind. In this book the mind is seen as a tool, only to be used when necessary. The mind or ego is an entity within ourselves with its own agenda. You can change and manipulate it what you want but it still has some basic wants and needs that it screams for to be fullfilled.
The Power of Now has a different way of solving challenges. When Anthony Robbins tells you to see emotions as signaling beacons from your body that something is not right and that you should take certain actions, Eckhart Tolle tells you to see emotions as ripples on the ocean that is the real you. He wants you to disassociate your higher self (which is the real you) with your mind/ego. Accept the world as it is now and perceive that the emotional reactions to the events in your life are from your mind. Your mind or ego has certain fears and often times does not want to acccept the world as it is, and then it uses emotions to push you into various directions.
I personally think the two types of Personal Development can be used at the same time. Using your mind as a tool when necessary and then having the best, most optimized, most productive tool at your disposal is a good thing.
Meta meta Personal Development.
Viewing Personal Development as adopting productive thoughtpatterns is a thoughtpattern itself. Maybe other people who are also doing the Personal Development dance have another more exciting or constructive way of looking at it. For me, viewing Personal Development like this is an exciting yet clear image of what is possible and how to do it. I know it won't always be easy, but if other people have done it, so can I.
I'd like to hear your comments on my view of Personal Development. Do you see it similarly? Do you have a more constructive way of viewing Personal Development? Do you think The Power of Now way of thinking is superior to replacing thoughts?
Thanks!