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I can understand that being a cause, but it really is not the situation here.
I am happy with who I am in a spritual sense. Physically I am ill, and I can not change that, and of course that makes me unhappy, but I have been this way before I was ever ill. I really do love to explore. But the question I pose, is not in the physical sense, of exploration, but in the sense of humanity.
When I have been through the gammit, now whenever I am presented with any situation, it is no longer something new. There is always a past experiecne, where I have had that " EXPERIENCE" . There does not seem to be anything that can be presented to me, that would allow me to experience something new. Of course I have my daughter , who I can do the best I can to teach my experiences to , in hopes that she makes wise decisions,
as we all hope for our chilldren. I can show her things that open HER up to new fresh possibilities that are new and exciting to her.
Mabey I just do not know how to relax,lol I know I have that problem, but I do not cause chaos as some people do that can not relax. I do not want chaos. I just want there to be something new to experience to get excited about again, afresh. So hard to explain this,lol
Ama  |